Wooden Spoon

I am reminded everyday that I lack much self-control and discipline. This lacking causes me to spiral into a dangerous lie of being in control, when in actuality, I self-inflict the very thing I am trying to get away from…

What am I doing and why don’t I have that right now??

(Source: foodaddict.me)

My life has been too busy lately, filled with countless hours of work, play, and mindless digging through whatever that is left.

Post-graduation has been all too productive, and still very much at a standstill if I think about it, since the actual graduating portion of my year.

While I may have a million questions regarding the next stages of my life, I’m always reminded how much God still is actively pursuing the greater part of my existence and my thoughts. Do I feel guilty that I do not nearly have as much rigorous passion for Him? Oh yes, many many times.

But I musn’t forget that the sovereignty of God rests on the fact that He has control over things that I do not. Such as the salvation of my eternal self and the pivotal identity of who I am.

Yet what I do have is the control over my attitude and my perspective on that, and it makes so much of a difference in my life if I have the right perspective.

“No longer conform to the patterns of this world, but transform by the renewing of your mind…”

That always rings through my head when I feel a little miserable inside.

If I possess any one thing in this world, it’s the perspective that I choose to see it in. And this perspective helps me understand, that while I may not have much, I have everything that I need to do all things.

When I sin, when I fail (which is inevitable considering our nature), I am not met with an ultimatum designed to keep me from reaching some star-studded “standard”, but instead, when I am faced with trials and failures, I’m met with an opportunity.

An opportunity to change, to do it differently, and to move forward, advance, grow, mature, and be even greater than I used to be because… what can I say… I’m God’s daughter.

This is the power of Christ actively living in my life.

However, it’s not as easy as it seems. There’s another force in my life, a force that makes me easily forget my blessings, that makes me forget that I am no longer of this world, and takes away my security that I had found in Christ.

It tries to imprison me in my own guilt, reminds me that I haven’t been as amazing as I should be, that I’m not as great as I thought I was. It turns my convictions into chains, it makes me work so hard to get back to “what it used to be like”.

When I fail, I should find comfort in the fact that I’m given another day to redeem it, but instead I feel like… I’ve failed and it’s going to take double the work to get back.

“The truth will set you free…”

When Peter denied Jesus three times, Jesus asked him later, “Do you love me? Feed my sheep.”
He didn’t shun him, He didn’t make him feel like the world’s biggest loser, nor did Jesus lay out Peter’s wrongs and made him feel every bit of regret… Jesus gave him an opportunity.

So to all my friends who are struggling with whatever it is, in whatever season, remember that every day you are alive is an opportunity given to do it bigger.

In the most simplest ABC sense, is to know who God is, what He’s done, and who you are and where you are in comparison to Him.

Even the mere act of admitting and recognizing your sin will not get you salvation.

To believe that acknowledging and changing your behavior is somehow going to bring you “heavenward” in a way is almost bordering on the thin line of gaining salvation through your own efforts.

Fully knowing, acknowledging, how distant we are from God when we sin, is repentance and the beginning of Sanctification. Which is very important as well in our Christian walk.

However,

Salvation is inherited through Jesus’ death on the cross (when we see it and we recognize God’s true desire and His nature) and when we believe in the Resurrection (the faith in God’s authority and power).

It was never through our hands to gain salvation, but it was God’s plan for us to discover and experience it in the fullness of its grace and power through experiencing it within our lives.

You have not encountered the Holy and Living Father until you see yourself in front of that cross.

If your whole body is not shaken up when you envision that veil being torn apart when Jesus drew his last breath for you to be able to enter His temple, you gotta take a few steps back until it hits you.

You do not want to miss the Presence of God swing past you.

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.” (1 Peter 2:9-10)

God is calling you into his royal priesthood.

The death of Jesus should expose your wayward self,
But the resurrection should give you hope and security. 

I’m kind of excited for Easter for some reason now LOL

So my prayers tonight go out to those strangers and friends alike who I could not fully give my answers to what I believe is to be the Salvation.

It is not a loophole for Christians.
It is not a license to sin.
It is not measurement of who is better or worse. 
It is not meant to chain you or to keep you from becoming who you are.
It is not meant to harm you, not meant to merely expose you…

but to give you hope.

It was designed for you to see for yourself where God is in your life,
and where He wants to be for you.

Remember He chose to die for you, because He wants you to know Him that badly, so it wouldn’t hurt to give Him a chance.